MONMOUTH Rowing Club has announced a sure fire way to rule the rowing world, with the new launch of its new ‘turbo oars’.

Any connection with the launch happening on April Fools Day is of course purely accidental, but the club reckon the advance in conjunction with a former NASA scientist could shave half a minute off their 2k times.

A post on their website says: “Monmouth Rowing Club is thrilled to announce the launch of cutting-edge Turbo Oars, designed to revolutionise racing speeds.

“Developed in partnership with top engineers from the aerospace industry (and a mysterious ex-NASA scientist who now lives in Usk), these oars feature built-in micro-thrusters that give an extra boost with every stroke.

“We expect to shave at least 30 seconds off a 2K race, which should make us unbeatable at regattas. There’s nothing in the rulebook about it… yet.

“The innovative oars will debut at the next regatta, pending final approval from British Rowing (or at least until they find out).

“In the meantime, members are encouraged to sign up for test sessions—just remember to wear heat-resistant gloves!

“See you on the water.”